This morning, David Kestenbaum had an amusing story on NPR called “How iMet my neighbor on iTunes.”

For those who don’t care to click the links or listen to the story, I’ll sum up. As Kestenbaum listened to music on iTunes, he saw a new source of music show up called “Anna’s Music.” Who is Anna? he thought. He talked to his wife and figured out that it must be one of his neighbors. He looked through Anna’s music and found it was the same music he listened to; she was his new musical best friend. As luck would have it – and in a twist I don’t quite understand – her e-mail address “popped up” when he clicked on one of the songs in her folder. So … he emailed her.

“I am not a stalker. My wife and I would like to have you over for dinner sometime.” That’s basically what he wrote. She never wrote back and it’s obvious that he was a little sad about that. One day his wife did some searching and found out which of their neighbors Anna was – a very nice gesture since she later admits being a little jealous of his “musical soul mate”.

He rang Anna’s doorbell and she came out to talk but was clearly weirded out. She says she wanted to believe that he was not a stalker, but in the end, didn’t trust his email. After all, she thought, he already has my email address, what if he shows up at my house?

In the end, Kestenbaum has no new musical best friend. Anna never came over for dinner. He encrypted his Wi-Fi connection. They don’t talk.

I started out writing a long-ish post about my own experiences as an “Anna” although mine are considerably less interesting since I was never discovered. But what really left a lasting impression on me in Kestenbaum’s story was the unspoken theme of loneliness, or yearning to make connections with people that possibly result in friendship. You see this not only in Kestenbaum’s response when he learns that Anna enjoys the same music he does, but in Anna’s response to his email. She said she really wanted it to be true, but in the end chose not to risk writing him back. Not that I blame her. The story probably would have had a different ending were it Anna writing an email to Kestenbaum.

I figure this theme is pretty universal. In fact, makes me think of this poem.

“Twenty Billion Light Years of Loneliness”
- Shuntaro Tanikawa (trans. Harold Wright)

Mankind on a little globe
Sleeps, awakes and works
Wishing at times to be friends with Mars.

Martians on a little globe
Are probably doing something; I don’t know what
(Maybe sleep-sleeping, wear-wearing, or fret-fretting)
While wishing at times to be friends with Earth
This is a fact I’m sure of.

This thing called universal gravitation
Is the power of loneliness pulling together.

The universe is distorted
So all join in desire.

The universe goes on expanding
So all feel uneasy.

At the loneliness of twenty billion light years
Without thinking, I sneezed.

I’ll leave you to think about that for a little while.